Lifeguard on Duty

posted by Evan Jake at 6:25 PM

The other day mom and dad took me on a walk up to the pool. We walk up there a lot, but because it's at the top of a hill, we don't always make it that far. I guess they're too lazy to push my stroller all the way up.

Anyway, this time, instead of walking past the pool, we went inside! Dad decided he wanted to go for a swim. And he was going to take me with him. So mom and dad put a special water diaper on me and dressed me in my very own swimming trunks. I don't understand the point of a pool diaper. If it's not supposed to absorb water, then what purpose does it serve when I wear it?

So once I had my special non-absorbent diaper on and my swimming trunks, dad picked me up and plopped me right into the pool. The water was really cold. And it smelled funny. But it was kind of fun. That's me in the picture wearing my trunks and splashing in the pool.

I loved the water. Sitting in the water and moving around was nice and relaxing. Almost as relaxing as being on a car ride -- I love car rides. I also liked kicking and splashing.

Dad and I got to have the pool all to ourselves. You see, there's one big pool for old ladies swimming laps and one smaller pool just for cute babies like me. Dad kept a tight grip on me in the water so I wouldn't swim away. While I was glad he was there to keep me safe, let me say I was thankful a lifeguard was on duty, too. After a few minutes of fun, dad took me out of the water and dried me off.

When we got home, mom gave me a nice warm bath to wash all the smelly pool water off me. The warm bath was much nicer than the cold pool. Maybe next time I'll just skip right to the warm bath.

~:O

Open Mouth, Insert Foot

posted by Evan Jake at 5:22 PM

I've bragged recently about how well I'm rolling over and sitting up on my own. I'm also pretty limber. That's me in the picture with my foot in my mouth.

I'm moving around so much these days, mom and dad strap me into everything. I used to only get strapped into my car chair (which I didn't mind because I love car rides). But now I get strapped to my changing table. I get strapped into my high chair. I get strapped into my rocking chair. And maybe mom and dad should start strapping me into my crib.

In my crib I like to roll around a lot. Mom and dad will put me in the crib facing one direction and I'll turn myself all the the way around. I just like to see the look on their face when they come in. They try to figure out if they put me in that way or if I spun myself around. Hey, a baby's got to have a hobby.

What I also like to do in my crib is practice my rolling. The problem is, I'll roll myself onto my tummy, but I'll get stuck there. And if you know me at all, you know I hate tummy time! Imagine, getting stuck having tummy time all alone in my crib in the middle of the night. Needless to say, this causes me to cry.

Mom and dad will come into my room in the middle of the night or during one of my naps and find me on my belly. It's gotten to the point now where they simply walk in, flip me back over and walk out. Like I'm an omelet or something. Maybe I shouldn't get so wild in my crib just yet. I'd be happy to stick with simply sucking on my toes. But the footies on my PJs always get in the way!

~:O

Sit, Evan Jake, Sit!

posted by Evan Jake at 7:19 PM

I've commented before on how many chairs I have. I have a high chair, a swinging chair, a rocking chair, a bouncy chair, a bumbo chair, a bath chair and a car chair -- just to name a few. But I have no need for any of them anymore. I can sit on my own! Be gone, chairs! (Well, except for my car chair. Apparently I need this for car rides and I love car rides.)

Mom and dad now plop me in the middle of the floor with my toys. That's me in the picture sitting on the floor and playing with some toys. I can sit there on my own quite contentedly. No batteries necessary. I'll occasionally flop to one side or the other. It's not because I can't keep sitting up. It's because I don't want mom or dad straying too far away. They better not get any ideas about setting me down and leaving me there!

~:O

Shots Happen

posted by Evan Jake at 7:16 PM

Turning six months old comes with a lot of new and exciting things. It also comes with another trip to the doctor. Mom and dad took me to see the nice doctor lady yesterday. It was scheduled during my usual naptime, which made me a bit cranky. But the car ride made up for it a little -- I love car rides.

According to the nice doctor lady, I'm growing like a should. I'm still in the 50th percentile of weight for my age, with a 98th percentile head. No wonder my neck gets so tired! (Yes, I'm still in the 99th percentile of cuteness.) The nice doctor lady was also very impressed with my personality and focus. She said I'm like "my own little person" already. What was she expecting, a puppy?

Mom and dad asked the nice doctor lady lots of questions. One of the questions they asked was how much food I should be eating. The answer was as much as I want! I like that answer. Who else gets to eat as much as they want and gets praised for gaining so much weight?! I like that nice doctor lady. Until the shots, of course.

Why do they keep poking me? It really hurts and then I feel rotten afterwards. I'd like to think those were the last shots I'll ever get. But something tells me that's not the case.

In other news, I got a fun visit on Sunday from my bubbe, pop-pop and double bubbe (that's my great-grandmother). That's me in the picture getting fed by my double bubbe. She's a pro. I could tell she's fed lots of babies. Everyone took turns feeding me, but double bubbe was the best.

It was nice having visitors. I got to show off my new tricks like rolling over and sitting up. They kept asking me to do my tricks and cheering when I did. Okay, maybe I am like a puppy. But a really, really cute puppy!

~:O

Happy Father's Day

posted by Evan Jake at 8:06 AM

Dear dad,

Today is Father's Day. I'd tell you to relax, watch some TV and let mom take care of me, but you seem to do that anyway.

I know we've had some rough times together. Like the first time mom left you alone with me and I refused to take a bottle. I know I got a little carried away that day. Maybe the constant screaming was bit much and I apologize for that. And then there was that nice dress shirt of yours I spit up on and ruined. I probably could have aimed in the other direction. Or the night you had an important meeting early in the morning and I felt I needed to cry all night. That probably wasn't fair.

Despite all that, you still take pretty good care of me when you feel like it -- or if mom makes you. You take me on car rides (I love car rides), push me around in my stroller and always give me my Pacie. Just stop forcing me to watch baseball games with you. They're boring and I can't understand the rules yet, as much as you try to explain them to me. Plus, your team stinks. When it comes to watching them, you cry more than me!

Well, the first six months of fatherhood have treated you just fine (despite the grey hair you found on your head). I think we've had some good times together and I think we'll start having even more fun in together the months to come. Meanwhile, keep up the mediocre work, dad!

Love,

Evan Jake

~:O

YOU FORGOT SOMETHING!

posted by Evan Jake at 8:18 AM

HEY, MOM! HEY! YOU FORGOT SOMETHING!!!!

Last night when mom put me down for bed, we did our whole usual routine. I got a clean nappy (that's what they call a diaper in England). Mom put me into my PJs (that's short for pajamas here in the US). And she put on my bedtime music ("Somewhere over the Rainbow" as performed by "IZ" Kamakawiwo-ole. He's Hawaiian).

Then, as mom does every night when the song ends, she put me in my crib and turned out the light. Only this time, she forgot something. MY PACIFIER!!!!

I don't know why mom forgot to put my Precious "Pacie" in. Because I really need it to go to sleep. Like, really. I cannot sleep without it. Mom certainly knows this. I can't believe that she simply forgot to give it to me.

Precious "Pacie" goes everywhere I go. On car rides (I love car rides with Pacie), on trips to the doctor (I hate the doctor, even with Pacie) and on walks in the stroller. That's me in the picture in my stroller holding onto "Pacie." But last night, I found myself in the crib and no Pacie! As soon as she left the room, I tried to let mom know of her careless oversight.

HEY, MOM! COME BACK! YOU FORGOT SOMETHING! I NEED PACIE! I NEEEEEED PACIE! MOM! WHERE'S PACIE?! I NEED PACIE!!!

Mom must have been listening to loud music or stuck under a large piece of furniture. Because I kept screaming for a really long time and she didn't come back. So I kept yelling!

Eventually mom came in to see what I was yelling about.

MOM! IT'S YOU! WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?! HOW COULD YOU FORGET MY PACIE?! CAN I HAVE IT? CAN I HAVE IT NOW? GIVE ME PACIE!!

I think mom got the message. She gave me Pacie and I was able to get right to sleep. I wonder what mom was doing not giving me Pacie like that. I hope she's not planning to take Pacie away from me. That would be a big mistake. A big, big mistake. Mark my words.

~:O

Semi-Annual Celebration!

posted by Evan Jake at 8:19 AM

Happy Half Birthday to Me!

Rather than go on and on about how great I am and how I've just gotten cuter and cuter over the past six months, I thought I'd let these pictures speak for themselves. Thanks for continuing to visit diaperlogue, the cutest blog on the web!




~:O

Why Are Yawns Contagious?

posted by Evan Jake at 6:11 PM

Mom keeps saying to dad that she's going stir crazy being home with me all day every day. What, I don't keep her busy enough? Well, guess what. Mom's not the only one who gets bored around here. There's plenty of boring to go around.

I'm not really able to do much on my own right now, which is why I require a lot of entertainment. Meals, naps, walks in the stroller and trips to Wegmans (I love car rides!) fill good chunks of my day. Sometimes I'll even just hang out on the couch. (That's me in the picture hanging out on the couch.) But the rest of the time, I need a little something more.

Mom has tried to get me to watch these "Baby Einstein" videos. I guess the name implies that they're suppose to make me smart or something. (I'm already naturally brilliant, of course, so why bother?). But there are so many previews and messages before the video starts that I usually don't make it through the opening credits. From what I have seen of those videos, they're certainly not going to make me any smarter. Tone deaf maybe. I mean, what's with that awful music they play?!

So to help with my boredom, mom took me out and bought me some new toys. She had to get permission from dad first because he thinks she spends too much money on me. Last week I heard dad say to mom something along the lines of, "Don't buy Evan Jake any more toys. Evan Jake has enough junk for me to trip on." If dad doesn't like mom spending so much money on me, maybe he should get a better job. Because I'm worth every penny. He better get used to it.

I liked the new toys mom got for me (with dad's money). They kept me occupied for a little while. But then I started getting bored again. Hey, I know what would spare some of my boredom: hanging out with dad more often. That wouldn't cost him any money. I think he likes hanging out with me, too. But I suspect that after a few minutes playing with me, because I don't do very much, he gets bored, too. I guess this boredom stuff is contagious.

~:O

Eating Disorder

posted by Evan Jake at 2:00 PM

I like my bottles. But it's only powder and water mixed together. That's not enough for a growing baby like me. So now I get a whole variety of squishy foods that come in little jars and different colors.

I love rice cereal. I love applesauce. And most of all, I love carrots! (Peas and peaches I can do without. Maybe when I'm older.)

That's me in the picture after eating some carrots. Why are they all over my face? That's because mom has really bad aim with the spoon. It's not my fault she can't hit a moving target!

When I see that spoon coming, I just get so excited. I'll flap my arms and open my mouth really wide. Mom then tries to quickly stick the spoon in before I squirm. Good luck.

After a few spoonfuls, sometimes I get lazy and won't open my mouth. That's when mom tries the "airplane flies into the hangar" trick. Since I've never been on an airplane, only car rides (I love car rides), I don't really know why an airplane would fly into a hangar. Needless to say, this trick does not work. That probably explains why as much of the pureed carrots are on my face as made it into my mouth.

Hey, mom, keep working on that aim!

~:O

Rawhide

posted by Evan Jake at 8:17 PM

I'm rolling, I'm rolling!

As you might remember, I've always hated tummy time. This was an activity mom and dad forced upon me. Not even the promise of a long car ride (I love car rides) could get me to enjoy tummy time. Mom and dad almost seemed to enjoy flipping me on my belly and watching me squirm. So, in an effort to take that sick thrill away from them, I've decided to start rolling onto my tummy by myself.

Yesterday, I was on the floor reaching for this toy to my right. (That's me in the picture on the floor.) As I stretched, my whole body flipped over, and there I was right on my tummy. I had reached my toy and was enjoying playing with it, so I didn't really mind. Then, in a bizarre twist, mom flipped me back the other way, cutting my tummy time short. She then moved my toy even further away. This was not very nice.

With my favorite toy now a couple more inches out of reach, I once again had to flip myself over to grab it. Mom was so excited. I was just happy to have my toy (even though it meant being on my tummy). Now, mom and dad, instead of handing me my toys, put them on the floor out of my reach. This may be amusing for them, but I don't think they realize how hard it is for me to keep rolling like that. Plus it makes me a little dizzy and I'll just spit-up on their carpet.

But the fun thing is that I'm learning to roll really good. I can go from my back to my front. And I can go from my front to my back. Hey, I wonder what would happen if I tried doing those two things one after another. I'll have to give that a try in the next couple of days. Maybe then I'll be ready to roll right on out of here and find myself a nicer place!

~:O

The Trip

posted by Evan Jake at 2:41 PM

I know you've all been eagerly awaiting an update from me. Mom and I went on a road trip this week and that kept me pretty tied up — literally. I spent the better part of this last week strapped down into my car chair.

While dad flew off to Los Angeles for a "business trip" — what business had to be done at Dodger Stadium, pray tell? — mom took me up to see nana and papa and all of their friends and family. I don't think it was so much about letting me meet all these nice people as it was a chance for mom to show me off. Everyone said how cute how I was, which is only stating the obvious. Dad, meanwhile, only had pictures of me to show people on his trip. I'm sure they all said I was super, super cute, too.

At first, mom thought about taking me on a plane ride to see nana and papa. But I love car rides. And mom needed to bring so much stuff with us, that she practically filled the entire car with all my toys, chairs, bottles, clothes and strollers. Mom could only fit one little bag of clothes for herself.

That's me in the picture in my ExerSaucer before we left. That didn't fit in the car so it stayed behind. The other thing mom couldn't fit in the car was my crib. So at nana and papa's house, I had to sleep in a fake crib. Mom set up the fake crib in a closet. Yes, a closet! You see, nana and papa don't have any shades on their windows in the guest room. And I can't sleep unless it's dark. Really dark. I slept pretty well in there. I actually started to like being in the closet — is there anything wrong with that? I even slept one whole night all the way through. I don't even do that at home. I hope mom and dad don't get any ideas about putting me in closets at their house. Those closets are small and packed with of lots of junk.

I liked nana and papa's house. It has stairs and lots of extra space. Even my closetroom was bigger than some of the rooms in mom and dad's house. I was just trying to imagine what nana and papa's big house would look like filled with all my brightly colored swings and chairs. Oh, that would be so sweet.

When I wasn't napping in the closet, mom took me around to where she used to work. Mom used to work?! And she took me to the college where she and dad met. Dad went to college?! I also got to see where mom and dad got married. I didn't realize mom and dad were so busy before I came along.

With all the people I got to meet, I started to get more comfortable with other people holding me and playing with me. I guess mom thought I didn't need her anymore. So one afternoon, during my long nap, mom sneaked out! She went to dinner with one of her friends. When I woke up, nana came in to see me. I like nana, but I kind of wanted to see mom — just for a second. That's when I realized she was nowhere around! I started to cry.

Nana had to call mom because I was "inconsolable." Mom came back to the house right away. Boy, was I happy to see her. I was a total snivelling wreck by the time she got back. It's not a good look for me.

We drove back home yesterday. I slept most of the ride. When we got home, dad still wasn't back from his trip yet. So mom put me to bed. But then, in the middle of the night, at that time when I usually wake up, guess who came in to see me? It was dad! At first I was a little confused. I was groggy and couldn't believe who I was seeing. I must have had quite a puzzled look on my face. But then dad picked me up and I gave him a smile (just a little one). We were all back together again. That made me happy. It's much harder for me to rule the family when we're spread all over the country. Once again, I'm master of the domain!

~:O