No Artificial Flavors

posted by Evan Jake at 8:31 PM

So my doctor thinks I might have food allergies. But I don't eat food, only milk. So I'm not sure what she's talking about.

Mom took the doctor's advice anyway and has gone and changed her diet, which stinks for her. She must like plain chicken and rice a lot, because that's all she eats now. It's called the "elimination diet." I think it's called that because it eliminates all the joy from of eating. Me, I really haven't noticed a difference.

So mom and dad tried giving me some fake milk instead. Notice I used the word "tried."

This fake milk stuff smells terrible and tastes even worse. Mom even tasted some of it herself and she agreed that it's pretty bad. "Yuk, this is gross," she said, cramming a bottle into my mouth. So I cried and cried. I refused to eat that stuff. I'll go on a hunger strike before I eat any more of that crud. Give me the good stuff!

Mom eventually gave up and caved to my demands. I'm only twelve pounds, but I'm in charge here. I think mom and dad are learning...finally.

Speaking of the doctor, mom took me to today to get more shots. I didn't realize where we were going at first. I was just so excited to go in the car (I love car rides). When I woke up from the ride, I was there in that cold office again, getting my clothes taken off. Then that sneaky nurse came out of nowhere and got me right in the leg. It hurt really bad. Naturally, I screamed really loud.

Now that I had those shots, I feel really lousy again. Mom will give me more of that tasty purple medicine to make me feel better. I like the purple medicine. If only the fake milk tasted that good!

~:O