In the Year 2000

posted by Evan Jake at 7:40 PM

Fast forward...

The year is 2023. The place is an Ivy League University. The setting is my first night at college and my freshman roommate has just arrived.

Evan Jake: Hi, my name is Evan Jake.
Roommate: Hi, roomie.
EJ: Welcome to our room. This should be a fun year.
RM: I'll say.
EJ: You know, I skipped my senior year of high school because I was accepted to college a year early.
RM: Really, you're that smart?
EJ: Well, I don't like to brag. So I let my perfect SAT scores do the talking.
RM: Wow, you are amazing. Say something brilliant.
EJ: "You need chaos in your soul to give birth to a dancing star."
RM: Huh?
EJ: Don't you recognize Nietzsche?
RM: Yeah, whatever. Say, Evan Jake. Can I ask you a question?
EJ: Absolutely. Just don't get all existential on me. My id can't take it right now.
RM: No, it's a simple question, really.
EJ: Shoot.
RM: What's that thing over your bed?
EJ: Oh, what this? That's my tent!
RM: Why do you have a tent over your bed?
EJ: Well, when I was just barely two-years old, I figured out how to climb out of my crib. So my Momma and Dadda got me this tent to put over my crib.
RM: Right, so why do you still have it?
EJ: I just loved my tent so much that Momma and Dadda were just never able to wean me off it. I've slept with this tent over my bed ever since.
RM: If you sleep in a tent, then where's your sleeping bag?
EJ: Sleep in a sleeping bag on top of my bed for the entire semester? That would be crazy.
RM: Yeah, crazy.
EJ: Hey, roomie, I'm going to turn in for the night. Will you zip up my tent?
RM: Sure thing.
EJ: I've got class at 9:15 tomorrow, so will you unzip me around 8?
RM: I'll see what I can do.
EJ: Thanks. Nite-nite.

~:O